A Journey of Recovery from Schizophrenia & Schizoaffective Disorder
My Basic Self
Hi, my name is Devinda (Dev) Goonewardene, and I live and work in Melbourne Australia. I was born in Colombo Sri Lanka in 1972, and parented by my mixed-heritage father and mother. I received the best of the Sinhalese stock of my father and the Dutch Burger heritage of my mother. We migrated as a family in 1986 to Melbourne and our family home was in Mcubbin Street, Burwood, Victoria, until the death of my mother Shelagh in 2013. My sister Devika passed over to the other side in 2009, also from cancer related causes.
I have had "schizophrenia" over a long period of time (even before birth/in the womb) and am just recovering completely.This recovery has been orchestrated by working through various types of issues, which have meant a new perspective, perception, and resolution.
The "symptoms" that I have experienced include mainly hearing voices around me, having visions, receiving verbal messages while watching TV, having strange feelings/bodily sensations; as well as issues with decision-making processes.
My Skills and Abilities - How I have interpreted my Symptoms
In recent years I have also become more aware of my own thoughts and feelings, as distinct from other peoples thoughts and feelings and the surfacing of new abilities such as telepathy and psychic abilities, including clairaudience (psychic hearing) clairvoyance (psychic sight) and clairsentience (psychic feelings). I have also developed as a medium and oracle. All of these established phenomena (in certain cultures and groups) were something that I did not associate with being a "normal, sane, well person", and neither did my culture of origin. However, over time all this has changed, and I now see myself as "well", and uniquely so.
This journey of learning, growth and development is something that I now cherish, even though I was very angry about my life and how things were working out over a long period of time, especially after experiencing family bereavement. So too, being on a Community Treatment Order since 2005 to date; being enmeshed in the Australian Victorian Mental Health System; visiting Lynwood House and Upton House for mental health issues; has all given me perspective. This is about the sense of how, being part of different communities and societies, will create both boundaries and barriers for expression of Self, and all the productive rather than destructive qualities that can be made out of different facets of Oneself.
My Psychiatric History
Regarding my car, and some possessions
After a failed relationship, I was so angry; I felt betrayed by people, myself, my life., and what I had invested a lot of time and money building. I could not find a way of being part of the New Age on Earth, still being lost in a Piscean architecture - under a god/goddess structural system that I did not feel was caring of me, my needs, and my vision. I was stuck in jobs that I could not really feel happy in and I felt that I needed to take stock of my life and what I had accomplished.
I was very into cars and driving, earning a living through delivering Italian food near the seaside in Middle Park. After my relationship collapsed I could not drive. I felt that I would have a breakdown on the road, and hence injure myself and others. My car was also having problems with its electrical circuitry - having break downs on the road. Further it was a Hyundai Excel GX hatchback in the colour oak (light purple) with around 120 K on the clock. So my decision was to have it towed away and to take time away from driving to get my perspective back and feel focussed on living again, when I knew that I felt suicidal.
It was after the above incident that my Mum called the Cat Team in Box Hill and I was taken by them to Upton House - a mental health facility in Box Hill. I spent two weeks there - this was in late 2003. I was very angry and hurt, because I had been throwing out things like CDs, my stereo system and speakers, and my SLR camera. I had not thought they were "bad karma" on some essential level, yet what I later found out was that the various computer chips in these systems did not favour or support certain types of relationships. Their quartz crystal frequencies were actually focussed on psychic connections in North America, rather than in Australia. In otherwords, by buying them I was actually in psychic contact with things, people, places and vibes, rather than where my body was actually physically present. This was the same phenomena that I experienced some years later when I went on to Clozapine: its psychic frequencies were connected to people in the States, especially UCLA and Harvard, who were working on DSM factoring in various people's lives, for one reason or another. There was a physical release for me via the bowel release in the afternoons Melbourne time, that was actually a psychic timing connected to the States.
Assumption of Bipolar Disorder: Period of excessive spending
It was Christmas time 2004, just before the Tsunami. I suddenly received a MasterCard in the mail with $ 5000 credit to my account. I had not been working much except for a small job driving a high school student to school . I was on Centrelink unemployment benefits and I was having problems with my existing credit card debt of close to $ 20,000.
I suddenly wanted to buy a new computer and accessories, so I went shopping on the further credit extension at Harvey Norman Nunawading (a big electronics store in Melbourne). On my first trip I bought a new HP laptop with a 3 GHz HT processor, and I made further trips buying a new Olympus compact camera at 4 Megapixel level with 10x optical zoom; an Olympus photo printer; and then Microsoft photo software and Microsoft Frontpage web design software. I also bought a Microsoft Xbox from a store in Chadstone.
I tried to stop over spending by not buying everything at once; but I could not ground myself in such a way. It was as if the situation dictated a psychic and physical input which I later discovered was based on an astral or higher dimensional necessity.
I want to note that a part of my ongoing issues are about how to release things, people, places in the best possible ways. Its as if I make psychic discoveries about what I get involved with and then feel smashed up mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. This has meant not wanting to work at a psychic level, but invariably that's where I go to. Edgar Cayce in his own timeline was trying to become a High Priest, in emulation of a previous life as the Egyptian High Priest Ra Ta. That fight out is still going on today, in my own life, until I release the karma that caused such a polarisation of values and what is deemed development of the soul on earth. In the end I am striving for a balanced expression on Earth.
Working with Mental Heath drugs over the last 14 years has enabled me to release molecular disfunctionality in terms of my energy fields - i.e. my thoughts, imagery, feelings and emotions are processed using Clozapine so that I can rewire my brain waves for health and wellbeing, rather than having psychiatric breakdowns repeatedly. I have been free of psychiatric break downs and hospitalisation for such for over 9 years now; and have no reason to be a part of this system, because I learned what I needed to as I went through them with an awareness of the timing in its place for optimum awareness, understanding and application.
So, just before the Tsunami struck in December 2004, I was hospitalised at Upton House in Box Hill, for somehow coming across as very very ill. I spent a month there as well as a month in rehab at Linwood House.
What did people see in me that I did not see in myself? Looking back it seems that it was about martyrdom. No one wants to be a martyr but for me it was a carry-over from past lives. This was how I made sense of life on Earth: not just a physical life but a psychic life invested to help heal and support the masses. To do this I took on a Shamanic expression of health and sickness in order to heal my self and to heal other on a surrogate level.; i.e. I would assume their illnesses as well as my own and heal the auras around everyone so that there is love within and for others; as well as a love of creative expression and fulfilment in life.
I was hospitalised again in 2008 for being unable to handle my life with premonitions of aeroplane disasters.
I was also hospitalised in 2010 for feeling suicidal and wanting to leave Earth and never come back. I felt that my life lay in outer space rather than stuck on Earth. I was somehow determined to find the connections that like in Star Trek there would be new discoveries.
Assumptions of Being Gay
It has taken me a long long time, but I discovered recently that the relationships I have forged in my current life failed because there was a sense of my energies being gay despite ostensibly heterosexual connections. It is the very first time in my soul recordings (the Akashic Records) that I was presented with the information about this perception of me as a soul lost in trying to be a High Priest when that was not my true perception of my self and later by others. Sri Lanka is both matriarchal and patriarchal but does not seem to have balanced vibrations. Balanced sexual and emotional vibrations enable channels of multiple awareness and expression - also brain waves become more powerful and integrated (as science is discovering).
This sense of brain waves is important to how you take up connections to others - for example following the dictates of our parents and what they and others want for us to experience, learn and express. The different parts of Edgar Cayce's soul consciousness are leading a shift on Earth for more and more people on Earth to find not just their other halves but both multiple soul group connections, and multiple opportunities for learning creative expressions.
The real truth is that I have a guide in my aura and energy fields that is actually Gay and separately Lesbian. They get picked up wanting things from others and therefore get picked up communicating with others in something the psychiatric people saw about me as being bizarre. There are times when I seem to have a female voice. It was this voice that wanted me in psychiatric care so they themselves could heal out together with me as I have done. These voices are connections to Mary and Jesus and their followers. Their expressive timelines were stuck in the past, and they now want New Age vibrations rather than the Piscean architecture that they were born in. This means becoming a part of the Indigo Kids, who are totally New Age and striving for new directions in expression.
True Soul Healing
In my story I talk about the importance of healing different timelines and therefore finding information about my past lives on Earth. I find this to be the chief causative connection in a metaphysical diagnosis of schizophrenia. To work these issues through means going to Shamanic Healing abilities derived by both self and others. This means healing the memories and emotions of different fragments of the human Soul and ET soul consciousness, over eons of time. It is for me a sense of reaching out in group Soul Work to make sense of time, culturally authenticated expression, and real healing, so that the problems experienced will not keep resurfacing in future timelines.
We are all living in a Great Epoch of Time, where there has been phenomenal growth within various societies on Earth today, giving enormous opportunities to explore the heights and depths of passion and expression.
Creative Holistic Healing: Who is Edgar Cayce?
Edgar Cayce (1877-1945) was an American clairvoyant with many gifts of the soul and spirit. He is credited as being a well-known photographer early in his life before he began using his talents to help those who sought his help and support. Cayce was able to lie on his couch and put himself into a mystical sleep state, enabling him to gain information from a Universal Source of expanded awareness and consciousness. Out of the 14,000+ Psychic Readings Cayce gave, there were around 9000 where there were psychic diagnoses and prescriptive treatment for medical conditions. Edgar Cayce was validated by various medical doctors (in his time) who were given information on a psychic and physical frequency in order to heal the medically afflicted people who reached out for Cayce's miracles of health, healing, peace and love.
Cayce and the Digital Age
I believe that Edgar Cayce's psychic readings are the causative connection in today's information super-highway. Together with the digital age of Music, and the numerical frequencies that underly 16 bit 44.1 Khz encoding are frequencies that can be extrapolated and used to build other levels of information, awareness, healing, and creativity. This is a fundamental shift of the colours of the auras, that are the fundamentals of existence and life on Earth. Cayce went to the subconscious mind as the foundation of creativity, as well as the stumbling block to expression.
It took me time to work out that in the end a direct channel of superconsciousness is now the way to work out issues and problems on Earth, so that one may live free of spurious subsonic artifacts, in other words no structural degradation of genes, over time. In this sense time is a mirror of sound frequencies and sonic expression. Once the harmonic expression of the Cosmos changes so does time and its felt effects on Earth.
So when I believe and express that Edgar Cayce was part of my past life heritage I argue that it is similar in terms of the frequencies that Cayce was working on in his timeline. In this sense people are able to see and hear Cayce in my energy fields, and therefore in my aura. My working relationship with Cayce in multiple parts of this planet and in other astral realms was built by learning to channel energies that we both saw as valid and valuable. Cayce did not plan on coming back to Earth at all after his death in 1945: he felt that he had repaid all of his past life karmic debts and that in his main American incarnation as the Sleeping Prophet he had fulfilled all his promises as a guide and leader in many different disciplines.
A Global Auric Tragedy
However, after the American and global tragedy of Sept 11, 2001, Cayce felt that his abilities were needed to restructure the auras of Earth and its diverse peoples, so that Peace may one day happen soon for all those who seek such. Today Cayce may be seen as an ET and Human combination of genetic fields with a mission to help as many people world-wide as well as in Outerspace, the Cosmos.
The challenge of the above is to what extent various spiritual beings will cooperate and help each other in the New Age on Earth; rather than working with the divisive sense of a universal God/ Goddess paradigm.. This may render various people happy about the extent of their roles in creating and co-creating their future.